Jokes for the day

Why did the potato go to therapy?

Because it couldn’t cope with the pressure of being a “chip off the old block”.

But then, the therapist said, “I’m sorry, but I can’t help you…”

“Why not?” the potato asked.

“Well,” the therapist replied, “you’re just too a-peeling, and I’m trying to quit carbs!”

Why did the comedian get a job at the calendar factory?

Because he had a week full of Sundays but he got fired…

Why did he get fired?

Because his boss said he took too many days off, but he argued back saying, “I was just trying to make my days count!”

Why don’t we ever hear a joke about paper?

Because it’s always tearable… But not as tearable as the one about the failed umbrella.

Why is it the most useless joke of the day?

Because whenever it opens up, everyone gets wet!

Why did the tomato turn red?

Because it saw the salad dressing?

Nooo…

Because it finally realized, it spent its entire life training for the ketchup league only to end up in a salad bowl… it’s a ‘fruitless’ endeavor indeed!

Why did the calendar break up with the clock?

Because it had too many dates and it found the clock’s “hands-on” approach a bit “time-consuming!”