Jokes for the day

Why did the scarecrow break up with the calendar?

Because it was tired of the calendar’s dates always being so corny, but when it complained, the calendar said, “Hey, I’m just trying to keep things current, so deal with it or leaf!”

Why did the joke break up with the punchline?

Because every time they got together, people laughed at their relationship!

Why don’t we ever hear about a joke winning an award?

Because it always cracks under pressure!

Why did the scarecrow break up with the cornstalk?

Because he found out she was a-MAIZE-ingly CORN-fusing, spending all her time on the cobweb, grain-ing followers, and couldn’t give him any KERNEL of attention.

And to top it off, when he confronted her, she just said, “Shucks, I thought you were outstanding in your field!”

Why did the scarecrow open up a self-help seminar?

Because he knew that no matter how many crows he scared away, people would always be outstanding in his field!