Jokes for the day

Why don’t you ever see ghosts arguing with each other?

Because they don’t want to have any bad blood, they’re afraid it might become too “visceral”!

So, there’s this guy who’s really passionate about collecting useless things, right? He’s got everything from a white crayon to a waterproof teabag, an inflatable dartboard, even a glass hammer!

One day, his best friend, seeing his crazy collection, decides to give him a gift. He hands over a nicely wrapped box and says, “This is for your collection.”

Excitedly, the guy tears open the wrapper, lifts the lid, and finds…nothing inside.

Why don’t we ever ask a calendar to keep a secret?

Because its days are always numbered, but worst of all, it has a week every month!

Why did the self-help book break up with its reader?

Because it got tired of him not committing to turning over a new leaf!

Why did the smartphone apply for a job?

Because it was tired of being unemployed and heard there were plenty of “cell”s available. But after getting hired, it was shocked to find out it was working in a “battery” farm!