Jokes for the day

Why did the chameleon buy a smartphone?

Because it wanted to take a selfie, but every time it tried, it just camouflaged with the background! The phone company told him the model with the “anti-camouflage filter” will be out next season!

Why did the scarecrow break up with the cornstalk?

Because it heard that corn was a-maize-ing at playing hide and seek, and it couldn’t handle a-ear of not being able to find its partner. But the real twist? The scarecrow was just outstanding in its field, but not so great at commitment.

Why did the tomato turn red?

Because it saw the salad dressing!

But then it realized, it wasn’t even in the salad, it was just a ketchup bottle on the shelf. It was just having an existential crisis, “I’m a fruit, stuck inside a bottle, pretending to be a vegetable!”

Why don’t we ever hear jokes about paper?

Because they’re all tearable… but here’s one anyway.

Why did the paper file a police report?

Because it was tired of everyone pushing its buttons and decided to finally “re-fold” on its abusers.

(Cue drum roll: ba dum tss!)

Why don’t we let vegetables run for the presidency?

Because every time we put a potato in office, it just sits there and says “I yam what I yam!”