Jokes for the day

Why did the scarecrow break up with his girlfriend?

Because every time he said, “I love you,” she would reply, “Hay, I’m just not that into you!”

And that’s when he realized, he was outstanding in his field, but she was just a bale of laughter!

Why did the smartphone apply for a job?

Because it was tired of its current gig as a paperweight. It said, “I have too many apps to be sitting under a stack of bills!” It got the job, but quit on the first day…

Turns out, it couldn’t handle the calls!

Why don’t secret agents ever play hide and seek?

Because good luck hiding when your name is James Bond, your favorite drink is a martini – shaken, not stirred, and every time you introduce yourself, you play your own theme music!

Why did the scarecrow win an award for being a stand-up comedian?

Because he was outstanding in his “field,” but his jokes were so corny, they made everyone crop their pants!

Why did the scarecrow win an award for being a comedian?

Because he was outstanding in his “field” of humor, but every time he told a joke, the corn would say “A-maize-ing”, the potatoes would reply “Eye see what you did there”, and the lettuce would declare “Romaine calm, everyone!”

But, the cucumber, he just didn’t get the “dill” with comedy… that’s why we call him a “pickle”!